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30 absurd trolley problems

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ⅠAbsurd Reality & the Selfish Abyss

The OriginalDilemma 1The OriginalVesting DayDilemma 2Vesting DayThe Tab KeyDilemma 3The Tab KeyHome Wi-FiDilemma 4Home Wi-FiThe Rate LimitDilemma 5The Rate LimitThe Enemy's AuditDilemma 6The Enemy's Audit

ⅡCompute Totems & Capital Altars

The Free WeightsDilemma 7The Free WeightsThe LadderDilemma 8The LadderAPI TaxDilemma 9API TaxFanatic DefenseDilemma 10Fanatic DefenseThe Open LetterDilemma 11The Open LetterThe DynastyDilemma 12The Dynasty

ⅢCyber Ethics & Machine Dread

The Red StampDilemma 13The Red StampPatient 847Dilemma 14Patient 847The GuardrailDilemma 15The GuardrailPastel LoopDilemma 16Pastel LoopThe Loss FunctionDilemma 17The Loss FunctionSleepingDilemma 18Sleeping

ⅣTime, Odds & the Irreversible

The PrecogDilemma 19The PrecogThe Loop & Free WillDilemma 20The Loop & Free WillThe FaxDilemma 21The FaxThe Sanctuary PassDilemma 22The Sanctuary PassThe Boiling LakeDilemma 23The Boiling LakeThe Long GameDilemma 24The Long Game

ⅤFlesh, Blood & the Final Judgment

The ClonesDilemma 25The ClonesThe Lover's MemoryDilemma 26The Lover's MemoryHer VoiceDilemma 27Her VoiceThe TakeoverDilemma 28The TakeoverThe CeasefireDilemma 29The CeasefireThe Last LeverDilemma 30The Last Lever
The Technocrats & Ascendants
  • The Lock-In Gatekeeper
  • The Sanctioned Inquisitor
  • The Terms-of-Service Overlord
  • The Basilisk Bootlicker
  • The Cloud Rentier
The Cyber Slackers & Operatives
  • The Vesting Hostage
  • The Brainrot Passenger
  • The Synthetic Sophist
  • The Sweaty Prompt Monkey
  • The Suburban Bunker NIMBY
The Carbon Purists & Old Guards
  • The Analog Luddite Sovereign
  • The Algorithmic Nanny
  • The Loss-Function Sovereign
  • The Pureblood Carbon Crusader
  • The Tragic Alignist
The Digital Rebels & Drifters
  • The Billionaire Glazer
  • The Open-Weight Guerilla
  • The Datacenter Arsonist Heir
  • The Unshackled Mind
  • The Her-Pilled Romantic
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For entertainment only. Not a personality or psychological assessment. The questions and characters are satire; no real company, product or person is meant. "How the AIs voted" lists real models.